The Edge of Wellness
by LittleJaneway
Summary: Another trip away from the ship by our comanding officers. This one leaves a long lasting impression. J/C


Disclaimer: I own nothing, as always. Well okay the idea was mostly mine.

Authors note: Done for VAMB's Spring Fling '09. Written for Ym who wanted something with a happy ending. I want to thank my beta Elorie, and she also gets a thank you for the wonderful muse poking. There might be more in this AU to come. I haven't decided yet.

**The Edge of Wellness**

**Kathryn**

I was starting to wonder if there was ever going to be a time when Chakotay and I would be able to take a shuttle away from Voyager and not end up either crashing, fighting for our lives, or in some alien holding cell, much like the one I was sitting in now. Granted, it had to be one of the more accommodating cells I had been in. The floor may have been hard, but it was heated and the cuffs that held my arms above my head were lined with something so soft I considered asking what it was so I could get a blanket made out of it. What ever it was, it was far better than the sharp metal cuffs that normally cut into my wrists. For a while at the start of our journey in the Delta Quadrant I thought I was going to have permanent marks on my wrists from all the times I was in a position much like this one.

While the amenities were nicer than most, it didn't erase the sharp pain in my left side every time I took a deep breath and that my skin itched from the dirt that was coating my uniform. Both were from the fall Chakotay and I took down a fifty-foot hill when we were being chased through the jungle, we mysteriously ended up in. When you are being followed by an alien ship the last thing you expect to happen is to be transported to an exotic jungle with your exotic first officer. Both Chakotay and I were knocked into oblivion after the trip down the hill; which meant that even as I sat there on the floor of the cell I still had no idea who my captures actually were. Worse yet, I had no idea where Chakotay was.

The cell was dark but not so dark that I couldn't see to the other wall. It was not a big cell and there was hardly enough room for myself and Chakotay was not sharing the tight space with me. Something inside though told me that he was fine, which was certainly not a feeling that I was used to when Chakotay was out of my site at times like this. If asked to describe it exactly I would have to say it was calmness. When I thought about him I felt calm.

A bright flash of light distracted my thoughts and the door to my cell opened. In walked a tall female alien with elf like features, and a smile on her face. I couldn't quite tell if it was a trick of the light or not, but it appeared to me that her skin and her blue dress had a bit of a shimmer to it.

"Good to see that you are finally awake. I was starting to get a little worried that there was something wrong." She said. Her voice was light and had an intoxicating quality to it.

"I would be doing better if I knew who you were and why you are holding us hostage. " I responded, trying my best to put my captain's mask in place.

"My name is Ralia. You are here because Sashin requested it. I will check with her to see if the time is right to let you out of the restraints."

"And my first officer?"

"Chakotay is in another cell down the hall. He is doing well and has been asking for you the moment he woke up Kathryn." Ralia shocked me by sitting down next to me and by using my name. "It is obvious he cares a great deal for you, which will please Sashin."

"Why would that please Sashin?" I asked confused.

Ralia giggled. "You will see. I will be back shortly." She put a comforting hand on my knee before she got up and left me alone in the dark once more.

My head was spinning. I couldn't figure out if it was because of Ralia's voice or if it was because I was tired and in pain. It was unpleasant either way. I tried to get my mind to focus and relax to help block some of the pain from my ribs. With my arms above my head for so long it was starting to become impossible to breathe. Thankfully Ralia was true to her word and was back with in about ten minutes.

"Here, this should feel better." She said while releasing my arms. "Don't get any ideas; I have brought Toma with me."

I peered around her shoulder and saw a male standing in the door way. He appeared to be shorter than Ralia, but he was definitely imposing.

"Alright, what's next?" I asked as I rubbed my arms trying to get the blood flow to return sooner.

"Now we need to get you cleaned up before seeing Sashin. She does not tolerate mess." Ralia helped me to my feet and for a second I wondered if I would be able to bust my way past the two of them and make my way through to where ever Chakotay was being held. My curiosity about what the hell was going on however, far out weighed my desire to escape. So far they were not overly aggressive and more importantly I had yet to see Chakotay and confirm that he was okay.

When I stood up I was amazed by just how tall Ralia really was. She stood almost two feet taller than I, while the man that was with her, Toma, was closer to Chakotay's height. It was going to be an interesting walk, which may have been the point.

"There is no other way out, so don't waste your time looking." Ralia said once we got to the door to the washroom. "Inside you will find everything you need. Put your current clothing in the recycler please. We will be right here when you are finished." She took the green bundle that Toma was carrying and handed it to me.

The facilities were nicer than the ones we had on Voyager and were definitely nicer than I had experienced as a hostage ever. First thing I did was use what I correctly guessed was the toilet. After that I got undressed and examined myself in the mirror, taking careful note of the bruising on my left side. Careful palpation of the area, made me flinch from the pain. At the very least I figured that I had two or three cracked ribs, nothing that the doctor couldn't heal up when we made it back to the ship. Everything else looked fine and any other aches I did have were quickly erased by the hot water provided by the shower.

Once I had dried off with one of the softest towels I had ever used, I unfolded the other green material, which turned out to be a long sleeved, floor length, deep green dress. I realized that my eyes had not been wrong earlier; Ralia's dress did have a bit of a shimmer to it, just as this one did. When I put it on, I also realized that just because the dressed appeared to be modest didn't mean it was. It hugged each and every one of my curves and left little to the imagination. The plunging neck line made me almost reconsider leaving the room. I fixed my hair the best I could with out a hair drier, cursing the fact that it would end up with a bit of a curl to it, then left the room, returning to my captures.

"Well that is much better isn't it? I barely recognized you with out all the dirt on your face." Ralia commented. I think it was approvingly but it was hard to tell with all the condescension.

"I want to see my first officer." I straightened my self out as much as I could.

Ralia laughed. "You will see him soon enough. Right now Sashin wants to meet with you." Toma moved in behind me and nudged me softly to get me moving.

With Ralia in the lead, the three of us walked down the various hallways in the compound. Each one was getting more and more elaborate and decorated. Many of them had colourful tapestries and beautifully painted pictures. Some of them even had wonderfully carved statues that were decorated with jewels and something that looked similar to the gold we had on earth. When we got to the end of a particularly long hallway, there were two huge doors carefully carved out of a dark wood of some kind. I assumed that it came from one of the trees in the jungle that Chakotay and I had been unceremoniously transported into.

"You can go in. She is expecting you." Ralia said as she and Toma opened the doors.

I stepped into a large ballroom, which was by far the most beautifully decorated room I had ever seen. Various jeweled sculptures lined the walls. The floors and the walls were covered in a deep purple stone that I have never seen before, but that had an almost blinding shine to it. In the centre of the room was a dark blue carpet that felt like fresh grass under my bare feet. It led to what I could only call a throne, with an Alien woman sitting in it. After meeting Ralia I was surprised. This woman was close to the same height as me and had darker hair than Ralia's and had a softer look.

"You're Sashin?" I stepped closer, doing my best to appear as though I was a person of authority in my own right.

"I am, Kathryn Janeway of Voyager." Her voice was deeper than Ralia's but had the same intoxicating quality that made it hard to focus.

"How is it you know who I am, but this is the first time that we met?"

"We scanned your…shuttle, before bringing you and Chakotay here." Sashin hesitated before the word shuttle. I wondered if it was because she didn't know the word of if there was another reason.

"And why exactly have you brought us here?" I allowed the frustration I felt sink into my voice.

"You and your first officer were interesting to the scientists in my ship. They thought that the two of you would make excellent candidates."

I did not enjoy the turn this was taking. Or at least where my imagination was taking it. "Candidates for what?"

Sashin got up from her chair and walked towards me. The closer she got the clearer I was able to see the almost diamond like shimmer that she had to her skin and raven black hair. "We are a people who are born with a perfect mate. Meaning for everyone on our planet there is someone specifically made for them. We are drawn to each other with a pull that is so strong, you know you'd be sick and die if you didn't get to see them just once. We become connected at a point where we can feel what each other is feeling, feel each other's pain, happiness, tears, fear and lust. Over the years we have met other species who have mates but they don't have the same connection. We wanted to know why." She explained. "Our scientists have realized that there is a certain part of the brain that needs to be turned on in order for that connection to be open."

"What does that have to do with me and my first officer?" I asked although I feared that I already knew the answer.

"Lately it seems that fewer of those that are born, are born with this ability. We were hoping that by studying some other species that do not do this naturally will be able to help us figure out why it might be that this is occurring. Most species that we encounter do not have the brain capacity to handle the treatment. Your species does. At least you and your first officer did. The procedure was successful. It gives us hope for our own species." I was startled by how calm her voice was considering what she just admitted to. I know my own blood was starting to boil.

"Let me get this right. You're telling me that you had your scientists perform a procedure on me and my first officer with out our permission." I did my best to avoid raising my voice which I was quite proud of honestly.

I noticed Sashin's face become a bit more serious. "You need to understand that we did it to help you and to help us."

"Why would you think that it would help us?"

"Everyone's life needs improvements. It was obvious your Chakotay and you would make a good match, we helped it along." I could hear the subtle tone change in her voice. She was getting frustrated because I didn't understand why it was okay to experiment on someone with out their permission first.

Where I come from people don't just decided who is going to mate with whom. We like to make that choice for our selves." I moved away from her because I was unsure if I was going to be able to keep myself from punching her cocky alien face.

"But we don't know how it worked. We need to run tests to make sure that everything is safe. You and your first officer will be allowed to leave shortly."

"You will not be running any tests." I hissed. "You will let us go back to our ship where our doctor can fix what ever it was that you did." I heard Sashin let out a sigh and I turned and faced her. To say that she looked displeased was an understatement.

"That is too bad Kathryn. I had hoped to get this done peacefully. We really don't intend you any harm. Now I will have to allow my guards to escort you back to your cell." I thought I had seen a flicker of red go through her almost black eyes. Ralia and Toma showed up with out her having to say anything I felt Ralia's hand close on my arm, just hard enough to elicit a small amount of pain. They turned me and started to lead me out of the room.

"And Kathryn." Sashin called out again. I turned my head and gave my best 'death stare'. "It will do you better if you would stop pretending that you hadn't already chosen Chakotay your self."

Ralia and Toma led me back to my cell. This time thankfully, Ralia didn't have anything to say. I was too busy trying to figure out a way out of this mess and wondering if the doctor would be able to fix anything that had been done by these aliens. It occurred to me that I had no idea where I was.

"Ralia, where am I? What planet is this?" I said before she shut the door to my cell.

"You are on the fourth planet from the second sun. It is called Alanla." She answered softly and closed the door.

The room seemed darker and smaller than it had when I was here earlier. It could be due to the information I had been given about why I was really there. Why anyone would think that it was okay to mess with people the way this species did. All I wanted to do was get up and burst through the door, but the thought of Chakotay kept me from doing that. I didn't know where he was, and that worried me, but more so was the knowledge that he wouldn't be all that impressed if I got myself killed breaking out of a prison that for all intensive purposes wasn't dangerous. Not only that, but I really had no idea what had been done to Chakotay and I. From the sound of it there was a great chance that if I ended up getting hurt then so would he and I wasn't willing to risk him for anything.

I did have to admit that I was grateful that my arms were no longer chained above my head, since breathing was still difficult and painful. The floor seemed harder, or maybe my body was just sorer. I noticed a pillow was placed in the corner of the room, obviously by someone who assumed that I was tired enough to take a nap. Perhaps if I had more answers I would have considered it.

******

**Chakotay**

I was thankful for the trip to what I guessed was the washroom. I felt better after the shower although part of that could have just been due to the fact that my arms were freed from the shackles or the fact that I was able to get some news as to how Kathryn was.

I lay down on the warm, but hard, floor with my head on the large soft pillow that had been placed in my room when I had gone for a shower. Probably put there by the silent Toma, while Ralia guarded the door. I shook my head and smiled. Aside from being kept in a locked cell this place was oddly accommodating. I had enough experience in this quadrant to know that accommodating usually meant more dangerous.

What was bothering me was how bizarrely calm I felt. Usually in a situation like this where Kathryn and I were separate and the last time I saw her she was tumbling towards a rather large tree, I would spend my time doing everything I possibly could to get to where ever she was. Yet as I lay lied there on the floor staring up into the darkness and thought about my captain, I felt nothing but calm. The exact opposite of what I wanted to feel like at this moment in time. I was pretty sure there was something written under the laws of irony that covered feeling uneasy about feeling calm.

I closed my eyes and tried to concentrate on Kathryn, since that was where my thoughts were going anyway, and trying to find away out of this cell to get to her was proving exhausting. I did the best that I could to centre myself and focus my thoughts, calling upon my ancestors to help me clear my mind. I called out to get a picture of her in my mind that I could focus on. The first thing that came into my head was the sight of her in a stunning green dress. It hugged her in such away, that it made my imagination useless. The clearer the picture in her in my head the less calm I started to feel. There was anger and I was pretty sure there was some feeling of violation. The latter was enough to complete rid myself of the calm that had unsettled it's self upon me and replace my common sense. I tried to refocus on Kathryn and push some of the more negative feelings aside. All I got this time was rage and confusion, most likely because she had been given the full explanation of what had gone on. I couldn't help but feel relieved at the fact that at least one of us was getting the full gist of the situation. I was also relieved at the return of emotions that I deemed more normal given the situations. It was enough to give me more drive to find a way out of the cell, and not to get complacent in the unusually comfortable accommodations.

There wasn't much time for my brain to come up with a way to get to Kathryn, before Ralia and Toma one again opened the door to my cell. "Let's see if you fair better than your Captain. Up." The tall alien nudged my leg. I would have had to have been deaf not to have heard the frustration in her voice.

"You say that as though she was slightly uncooperative." I got to my feet and smiled at her.

Ralia rolled her eyes and shook her head. She didn't say anything as she led me down the very ornate hallway to a very ornate set of doors. Toma opened one of the doors for me and I walked through. Once on the other side, I was greeted by an angrier, darker, smaller version of Ralia.

"Sashin?" I said trying to make sure my voice sounded authoritative. The Elvin woman's raven hair was tussled and she bore a look of frustration that indicated that she had met with Kathryn. There was a tell tale sign when ever Kathryn managed to drive a person nuts. I recognized it when ever I looked in the mirror after the two of use disagreed on anything.

Sashin turned to me. I watched as she tried to get some control over her emotions. "Chakotay, I can only hope that you are more understanding than your captain."

"It would really depend on what your explanation as to why you have brought us here is."

"Our scientists thought the two of you were an interesting couple. They modified your brains to respond to each other in a manor that is similar to how our species interacts." I was surprised by how blunt Sashin was. Apparently the more eased in version went to Kathryn and it also explained why she would have had little to no luck getting co-operation from her.

"I can't imagine why Captain Janeway would have had a problem with that." I scoffed.

"Yes well, your attitude aside, it is done. We need to test the strength of the bond before we let you go, so we can see how to apply it to people here." Sashin turned and faced the throne like chair at the centre of the room.

"We are not used to allowing ourselves to be tested on. Let alone being okay with being tested on with out permission, even if it is being used to help."

Sashin nodded. "Your captain said something to that effect." She turned back to me. "I had hoped to find you a little more understanding."

I shrugged. "I'm sorry I couldn't be more helpful."

A smile appeared on the woman's face and I felt my stomach turn. "The tests will proceed. They will simply be in our control, not yours." She nodded and I turned around in time to see Toma and Ralia enter with Kathryn along with two other males.

Kathryn did not look impressed, but in that shimmering green dress it was hard to keep my eyes on her face. I could tell by the look in her eyes that she had reached the point where if she had a phaser handy she would start shooting. It was no secret that Kathryn didn't enjoy not being in control. It made her an amazing captain but it also made her one of the worst hostages.

I turned back to Sashin who had a glint in her eye. "Hello again captain. As you can see your first officer is fine just as I had said." Sashin smiled.

I saw Kathryn give the alien leader a full out death glare. She tried to move towards me but I saw Ralia grab her arm hard and pull her back. That one movement almost had me lose my temper but I thought better of it.

"Commander are you okay?" Kathryn asked through her teeth.

"I am fine Captain. Not even a scratch." I was happy to see that she looked relieved. "You?"

"A few scratches, but nothing that I haven't dealt with before." She tried to put a smile on it, but I knew better. I could feel better.

"Aww how sweet." Ralia mocked. "Sashin can we start yet? These two are starting to get on my last nerve."

I saw the look of increasing annoyance on the tall alien's face, which happened to occur at the same time Kathryn rolled her eyes. Ralia was going to be the one to watch out for if Kathryn couldn't behave.

"Yes Ralia. Bring the captain to me. Toma, place Chakotay in the centre of the room." Sashin ordered. She had a small smile on her face, one that unnerved me. Still, Toma was strong and I found it more prudent to do what I was guided to do rather than starting something, a tactic I hoped that Kathryn followed. Granted I knew that it was quit a hope to expect her to act rationally. To my surprise the woman calmly walked with the tall prissy looking elf towards the creepy smaller elf leader.

"Are you going to tell us what is happening?" Kathryn snapped. Ralia back handed her and I saw as Kathryn's head snapped hard to the right side. I had the intention of breaking free from Toma then going over to Ralia and breaking every bone in the alien's hand, but a sudden sting on the left side of my face caused me to hesitate and allowed Toma the chance to get a stronger hold on me. One that I wasn't going to be able to break with out breaking bones of some kind.

"You have quite the mouth on you Kathryn." Ralia said. Kathryn just glared at her.

"In answer to your question captain, the first of many tests." Sashin said. There was something in her voice that actually hurt my ears. It was a different timbre than the one she used with me earlier, but I couldn't quite place what exactly had changed to drive my ears nuts. I watched as Ralia repositioned herself so she was behind Kathryn, with what I was sure was a rather painful grip on her arms.

"Ready Ralia?" the tall alien nodded. "Good." Sashin nodded at the men that stood behind me.

Everything after that seemed to happen in slow motion. I saw Kathryn's eyes go wide and felt her fear before I felt a sharp pain in my right side. I did my best to not cry out from the sudden pain but my eyes watered. Through the tears I saw Kathryn twist in pain. I heard her scream and I thought I saw Sashin move to comfort her, which didn't quite make any sense in my head. When time started moving at normal speed again I felt Toma's grip on my arms release some, giving me the chance to take advantage of the sudden adrenaline rush. I broke free of the alien's grasp, throwing him to the stoned floor then pushed passed the now frightened scientists and rushed towards Kathryn. She was barely able to stand and was leaning against Sashin. Her eyes met mine and I saw the fear and the pain in her eyes, and it felt as though someone had reached in my chest and tried to cut out my heart. I reached my arm out to pull Sashin away from Kathryn forgetting entirely about how protective Ralia was around her leader. The overly annoying alien woman came at me faster than I had anticipated and clocked me hard enough to send me unceremoniously to my ass. I attempted to get up but a swift kick to my left side kept me on the ground and another cry of pain came from Kathryn.

I tried to get my bearings before attempting anything else stupid. I saw Sashin lower Kathryn to the floor. The leader gave a nod to the scientist behind me and I could see the look of satisfaction on her face. I felt the alien hands left me to my feet, causing what I guessed was a stab wound, to tear and send another wave of pain, (as if I needed more), through my back. The intensity of the pain was enough to send me to the land of stars.

When I woke up the first thought that came to my mind was Kathryn. The second was how bright everything was. This was most certainly to the cell that I had been placed in. I attempted sitting up, I needed to know if Kathryn was around, because all I could feel was her fear and her anger. The only other person in the room was a doctor standing next to an alcove in the wall. The medical bay fit the over exuberance of the whole building. It was bright, white and had jeweled accents on almost everything. I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and waited for my head to clear.

"Welcome back commander." Came the deep male voice of the doctor. The first male voice I had heard since I got here.

"Where is my Captain?" I muttered. He turned to me and I was not entirely surprised to find that he was dressed all in white, the fabric made with the same iridescence as every other article of clothing I had seen so far. His face was friendly than anyone else I had seen since Kathryn and I got here.

"She is safe. You will see her again shortly." He started scanning me. "Interesting display earlier."

"What do you mean?" I asked confused. I wasn't in the mood for chit chat. I wanted to get to Kathryn to see for myself if she was okay.

"You and your captain responded in a way we hadn't anticipated. Although, it showed that we were right in the choice of you and your captain." He put the scanner down. "You are fit to go. Not even a bruise left. Your species heals quite quickly."

The doctor left me sitting confused on the bed while he went to the door of the medical bay. Again I was greeted by the stern face Toma. Although I was thankful that it wasn't Ralia. At this point I wasn't entirely sure I would be able to keep from punching the haughty alien bitch square in the mouth. For now I was fine behaving as long as it meant I would see Kathryn. "Keep up the good work Chakotay." The doctor said as Toma led me from the medical bay.

******

**Kathryn**

A flash of Chakotay in pain and calling out my name woke me out of what I had believed to be a restful sleep. Once again I found myself on a warm floor in a dark cell. There was at least a mattress under me this time and a rather comfortable one at that. It made me long for my bed at home in Indiana.

I made an attempt at sitting up but my entire body screamed in pain. Only then did I remember what had gone on in Sashin's chambers. Remembering the man in the white coat step up behind Chakotay and stabbing him in the back and then feeling as though the knife had gone into my own side. I remembered the once sharp tongued leader offering comforting words as my body was wracked by waves of pain. Pain that only got worse when Ralia kicked Chakotay in the ribs on the same side where I already had my own cracked ribs, which were undoubtedly now broken. I reached my hand behind my right side to check to see if there was a wound and sure enough my fingers found something that felt like thread incrusted in blood through a tear in my dress.

I pulled my hand out and sighed. Broken ribs, a stab wound and a headache and I was pretty sure I hadn't eaten in almost three days. I sighed trying to figure out exactly what to do next. The question was answered for me when the door opened and Chakotay entered with a tray of food. My first moment of happiness since this whole thing started. Although I had a choice to make regarding whether or not to try and sit up on my own and show just how much pain I was in, or ask for his help and admit a certain level of vulnerability. I chose to use the walls as leverage to help me to a sitting position. Proud of my self for only grunting a few times.

Once Toma shut the door. Chakotay quickly placed the try down on the floor and moved to help me sit up the rest of the way. "Well that answers the question I had about how you were doing." I said giving him a smile. He certainly looked fine.

"I could say the same about you." His voice was calm but I could see the worry in his eyes. I put my hand on his as the only gesture of comfort I knew of.

"I am okay. Just a few scratches." I smiled and looked for any sign of what had gone earlier. He looked good. No signs of anything that had transpired earlier. His hand came up and moved a strand of my now very tussled hair from my face and touched a spot on my forehead that caused me to flinch.

"I don't remember you getting hit there." He whispered. His hand moved down to my left side and even Chakotay's gentle touch caused me to cry out. "Broken ribs." Then his hand moved around to my back on the right side. Finding the tear in my dress. "Spirits Kathryn." He gasped. I could see the anger in his face.

"None of those injuries are yours. Why would they heal me but not you?"

I shook my head. "Who knows." I leaned back against the wall and closed my eyes. "And you're wrong those ribs were cracked rolling down the hill, making them all mine." I heard Chakotay shuffle to get the tray of food.

"You need to eat. The food looks and smells safe."

"Is any of it coffee?"

I heard him chuckle. "No luck."

My eyes opened so that I could inspect the food my self. I worried that it might be another test and the last one didn't turn out so well. Then again not having eaten since I got here out weighted my fears. Chakotay and I sat in silence. I felt calm having him there. Through all the anger and frustration I had about the whole situation, being with him, even thinking about him seemed to take over all the other emotions. That in its self was unnerving.

"What is going on here?" Chakotay threw his fork down on the tray, startling me and causing me to jump.

"Which part are you referring to?" I asked.

"The part where all I care about is making sure you're okay, not getting us out of here. Or the part where you have injuries that I received. Or how about why after going to great lengths to keep us apart, they have now locked the two of us together." He vented.

I thought about it for a moment. "Sashin told me about the way the mating works on this planet. How the brain chemistry is specifically designed to react with one other person." I hesitated. "She said the scientist modified our brains to respond the same way. They wanted to see how another species dealt with it so they could figure out a way to help other people on the planet." I leaned back against the wall out of breath. The very least they could have done was given me something for the pain so I could have an easier time breathing.

"That would explain a few things – "

"The unusual calm?" I interrupted.

"For starters." He smiled at me and I could have sworn my heart skipped a beat. "But feeling each others emotions is different then having identical wounds."

"Or dreaming about things that never happened." I whispered.

"Maybe they messed up." He grabbed my hand.

"Or maybe this is how what ever changes were made manifests in humans."

"We need to get out of here and back to the ship. You need to see the doctor and maybe he can fix this."

I looked up at him. He looked so sad and worried. Usually by this point the two of us would have found a way to bust out of here. We would not be sitting calmly discussing our need to get back to the ship. My vision started to get blurry and Chakotay squeezed my hand.

"What's wrong?"

I shook my head. "I don't know. I just suddenly feel so tired and dizzy." I felt his arm slip behind me then pull out quickly.

"Dammit." He muttered.

"It's bleeding again?" I asked even if I already guessed the answer.

He took off his shirt, balled it up and placed it on the spot on my back. The pressure caused me to cry out and I felt tears roll down my face.

"You are going to be okay." I noticed tears in his eyes. "I need you to hold this here so I can get help." I nodded and moved my arm so that I could keep the fabric in place.

Chakotay went to the door and started banging on it as hard as he could. "Toma! Ralia! We need help in here!" He kept slamming on the door. It didn't take long until we heard the familiar sound of the door unlocking as Toma came in. "Please, she's started bleeding again." The two men knelt down in front of me. Chakotay grabbed my hand as Toma leaned in and removed the cloth from where Chakotay had placed it and then as quick as he had taken it off he replaced it.

"Pick her up and follow me." Came a soft but deep voice from the normally silent alien.

Chakotay only nodded. He stuck his two bare arms under me and gently lifted me. I tried not to cry out as the lift jostled my ribs. I leaned my head on his shoulder and whispered in his ear. "I will be alright."

"You don't know that." He whispered back.

"Walk carefully." Toma said as the led us through the corridors.

Chakotay growled. I saw Chakotay turn back and give a small smile but the alien said nothing. It wasn't long before my eyes were blinded by the bright lights of the medical bay. I had thought the lights in sickbay were harsh, but the constant reflections off the abnormally brilliant white walls made the light in here more than ten times worse.

"What's wrong?" I heard a frantic male voice ask. I assumed it was the doctor, but I didn't have the energy to look. I simply closed my eyes and relaxed against Chakotay.

"She started bleeding again." Toma explained.

"Not good. Please commander, put her down on the bed." I felt Chakotay start to lower me and place me gently on the softest examining bed I have ever felt so that I was sitting up. I opened my eyes as I felt his arm slip from under me. I was confused when I saw the look of utter terror in his eyes. I had never seen him like this before. Well maybe once, but can someone really trust a vision placed there by an alien trying to get you to cross into their matrix? He leaned down and kissed my forehead.

"Please move aside Chakotay." The doctor, a taller alien than Toma came around me and removed Chakotay's balled up shirt. I could feel him gently examining the wound with his fingers.

"Some of the stitches came out and I think it may be infected." The doctor sighed. "I have something that will do the trick.

"Why didn't you heal her the way you healed me?" Chakotay's voice sounded angry again.

"Because he didn't heal you Chakotay." I lifted my head at the sound of Sashin's voice. The woman looked worried.

"What do you mean? I was the one that was stabbed not her." The level of Chakotay's voice went up. He was going to start throwing things if he didn't get some answers soon.

"Chakotay, calm down." Sashin said. "I can't explain anything to you if you get upset and the more you get upset the more Kathryn gets upset which means the more you get upset."

"What the hell are you talking about? When the fuck are we going to get answers!" He turned and slammed his hand hard into the wall. I actually felt the bones in my hand snap, which caused me to scream out.

I straightened up, trying to find a more comfortable position that would hopefully get me to feel a little less pain. "Chakotay enough!" I forced the captain's mask back into place. Everyone in the room stopped and looked at me. I reached out my one hand that was not on fire, to him. "Chakotay, look at me." He turned and faced me. When he did, I saw the tears running down his face. I wiped them away. "Let her explain, because the more we know the sooner we can get out of here. Okay?" I wondered if he could tell that I wasn't entirely sure that everything was actually going to be okay, or if he was just taking my word for it. Either way he nodded and turned back to face Sashin.

The doctor continued getting the supplies he needed. I felt him cut open the dress and apply something that made most of the ache disappear.

"What is going on?" Chakotay asked again, calmer this time. I saw him look down at his hand. "Why does my hand not hurt?"

Sashin moved towards me, but Chakotay blocked her way. I saw her face fall. "I'm sorry." She said softly. "This has never happened before. We have had successes before but never with this reaction." I saw her turn to Toma, who nodded as though to give his approval. "Did Kathryn explain what we were trying to do?" Chakotay nodded. "Usually if the process works, both partners share the burden of physical and emotional pain. In this case however one has decided to take more of one burden than the other. I am not entirely shocked that it is you Chakotay who has decided to carry the burden of emotion, it explains why you feel so out of control."

I saw Chakotay sigh. "Nor is it a surprise that Kathryn took the physical burden. Granted usually if this happens with our species it's the stronger of the two. Not to say that Kathryn is weak, but our doctor has said that she is not in peak physical condition." Sashin continued. "Long nights, little food, little rest, I'm guessing."

"We already know what our own habits are Sashin. What we need to know is how to get back to our ship." I said. The world was starting to spin again and I wondered if it had something to do with the infection or what ever it was they used to treat the infection. "We need our own doctor."

There was a look of sadness on the alien leader's face. This was not the first time we had come across a race of aliens that had used us to benefit their own species but it was the first time that I felt as though the aliens felt remorse for how their tests turned out. Ralia might have been a different story but, Sashin seemed as though she genuinely didn't want to see us hurt. I caught a side glance she gave to Toma, there was fear there.

"We will allow you to contact your ship. I really would prefer we leave off on friendlier terms." Sashin said.

"Fat chance of that." Chakotay scoffed. I squeezed his hand.

"We will stay in orbit long enough to allow things to calm down. I'm sure our Doctor will have questions, as will our chief of security." It was becoming harder to talk, due to my body's inability to fight off the exhaustion. "We will reevaluate after that."

Chakotay looked at me, and it was more than clear that he had no intention of agreeing to any such thing. I knew however that Tuvok would be more pragmatic about the whole thing. If I could get Chakotay to calm down he would be able to see that agreeing to work with these aliens would be beneficial in the long run, if not just for our health then probably for supplies. Besides I had a feeling that once the doctor fixed what ever it was that Sashin had her scientists do, we could easily play the guilt card.

"I would like to see that happen, but will understand if you do not." Sashin hung her head.

"Yeah I'm sure you will." Chakotay snapped.

I tried to squeeze his hand one more time, but I couldn't. There wasn't any strength left in it. I realized then that my feet were cold; that everything had suddenly gone cold. I had lost too much blood. "Chakotay." I whispered. He turned to face me, his eyes both angry and frightened.

"What is it?"

"Something is wrong." I gasped, as it suddenly became more difficult to breath. Instantly the alien doctor was beside me and scanning me with what looked to be a sleeker version of a tri-corder.

"She has lost too much blood, her organ systems are shutting down." The doctor's panicky voice was the last thing I heard before my world went to the all too familiar black.

******

**Chakotay**

My heart almost stopped as I watched Kathryn's body slink down on to the bed. I didn't know anything about the technology that these alien's were using but I knew enough to understand that frantic high pitched beeping usually didn't mean anything good. Coupled with the fact that I had heard the doctor say that Kathryn's organs were failing, and every body part went an ice cold.

As the doctor and his assistants worked, I turned to Toma and Sashin. "We need to get in contact with our ship immediately." I said frantically. "I'm sure you're doctors are very good but our Doctor will be able to help her much better. Please. I'm begging you." I turned back to Kathryn. "Her injuries are serious."

I saw Sashin give Toma a quick look before turning back to Kathryn and I. She reached into a pocket on her dress and pulled out the two Starfleet communicator pins that we had when we first left Voyager. "Here, they are close enough that they should be here in minutes if you call them." She handed them both to me. I pinned one on Kathryn, and tapped the other.

"Chakotay to Tuvok." I did what I could to keep my voice from shaking and giving away the emotion that was pent up inside.

There was a crackle on the other end before the stoic Vulcan voice came through. "Tuvok here commander. Are you and the Captain okay?"

"Not yet Tuvok. We need to be beamed directly to sick bay. Please meet us there and we'll explain everything."

"Understood. We will be in transporter range in approximately 45 seconds."

I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes, remembering that this time the Vulcan's need for accuracy was actually a comfort. 45 seconds was the best I could have hoped for. I leaned over Kathryn, my hand still in hers, and kissed her forehead. Before the familiar blue light engulfed the two of us, I gave the alien leader one last look. I wished that I was big enough to accept the look of apology in her eyes, but that would have to wait until I heard what the doctor said.

The first thing that I heard when we were safely back on board our ship was the Doctor's grating voice. "You two must have been away from the ship together again." Came his not so subtle attempt at humour.

I lifted Kathryn carefully to the bio bed, and chose to ignore his tone. I was not in the mood for joking around. "I don't think any of the injuries are serious, but they could not fix them on the planet." I whispered. The tumultuous flow of emotions had yet to subside and I wondered how much of them were hers.

"A stab wound to the lower right side, four broken ribs on the left, what looks to be a minor concussion; definitely things that I can repair. It appears though, that she also has an infection, and the amount of blood that was lost was substantial." The Doctor nattered on. He looked up at me and must have saw something in my face. "I can assure you commander that she has sustained far worse. She will be okay." He reassured me.

"I understand that Doctor." Was all I could manage.

I was so busy concentrating on Kathryn that I did not even hear the doors to sick bay open as Tuvok came in. Hell, he could have been in sick bay since we beamed in for all I knew. I only know that I jumped when I heard his voice.

"Commander."

I turned to face him. "Right, Tuvok. We need to stay in orbit around the planet. They may be of help to the Captain's condition as well as my own."

His eye brow raised, the only sign we had when the Vulcan was confused about something. "What condition is that Commander?"

I sighed. "They did something on the planets to alter the chemistry of our brains." I started. I spent the next fifteen minutes explain to both Tuvok and the Doctor everything that had happened in the three days that we had been away from the ship. The Doctor in his own right was out raged. He would be the first to deny it but I was more than sure that the hologram was hurt when any member of his crew was violated in such away. Tuvok for his part looked mildly annoyed, although I couldn't quite figure out if it was everything that had happened down on the planet that annoyed him so, or the thought of having to stay in orbit.

The Doctor scanned Kathryn's unconscious body one more time, and went to one of the station to look over the findings. "I don't actually see any hints of alteration. I'll have to do a few more scans to see, but it might simply be that they enhanced a capability that was already there." He sighed. I could sense that there was more that he wanted to say, but over the last few years the Doctor had learned when to hold his tongue. "I will let you know when I know more Commander. Right now you should go get some rest."

I shook my head. "No. I will stay here until she wakes up." My voice was harsh. They would not send me away from her right now. Later I would go and talk to Tuvok about what needed to be done if I had to, but right now my place was next to her until she woke up.

"I will go back to the bridge Commander. Doctor, please update me as to the status of the Captain." Tuvok turned and left sickbay before either the Doctor or I had a chance to say anything.

I pulled up a chair and sat down next to the bio bed that Kathryn's body was occupying. I hoped that if I concentrated I would be able to calm myself down. Being back on the ship certainly helped, but there had been too many times with Kathryn in the position that she was in now. My fear was that if the Doctor was not able to fix everything that had been done, if she retained the ability to take the physical pain that I felt and make it her own, then she would be like this too many more times. At least while we were in the Delta Quadrant. The thought made me want to create Kathryn, her own protective bubble room to keep her in.

The Doctor for his part kept scanning both Kathryn and I to try and find the answers that he wanted. I could hear him grunting and sighing. The man was definitely frustrated, which didn't bode well for either of us.

I heard a small moan coming from the still form that was on the bed in front of me. "Kathryn?"

"Chakotay?" She whispered.

"Ah good. Welcome back Captain." The Doctor came over and started scanning her for like the hundredth time. I had to keep myself from chuckling. Even half conscious Kathryn was annoyed by the Doctor's presence.

"We're back?"

I grabbed her hand. "Yes we're back."

"Hello to you too." The Doctor pretended to be hurt by her lack of acknowledgement to him. "You are going to be tired for a little while because of the blood loss, and a little sore from the broken ribs, but other than that you are as near to one hundred percent as you can be."

Kathryn smiled. "Thank you Doctor." There was something that was still haunting her eyes, but she looked as though she was too tired to deal with demons right now. She patted my hand as a sign of agreement.

"While you were out, the Commander explained to us the best he could what had happened on the planet." The Doctor's faced turned more serious. "However, all of the scans that I have done, show that nothing was really changed in the brain. It appears that what really happened was they allowed your brains to reach a higher potential. I feel a little out done honestly."

"What does that mean for us Doctor?" I asked.

He shook his head. "I am not sure. What I do know is that I can't undo what they have done. Perhaps if we talk with them – "

"They said that they couldn't do it either. You saw the level of medical science they used to patch Kathryn up…" I was starting to get angry again. "They said they could answer questions, but they didn't know how to undo what they did."

"Hrm, well I will have a chat with some of them and see what can be done. In the mean time I want the two of you to go and get some actual rest. I don't want either of you returning to duty before we have this sorted out." The Doctor ordered.

I was surprised when I saw Kathryn nodding, but the two of us left sick bay and made our way through the corridors to our separate quarters. I wondered if leaving her on her own was truly the right idea or if I should have gone in with her considering how tired she looked. I made a note to myself to check in after I had gone through getting myself cleaned up, and back into a uniform.

The sonic shower did not feel as relaxing as the shower had back on Sashin's planet, but it felt more like home. There was that certain air of comfort you got from showering in your own home, that you couldn't get any where else, even if that some where else had hot water. Once I had gotten cleaned up I sat down on my bed and tried to think of what to do next. The first thought that came into my head was to rush to Kathryn's side, but everything inside told me that she was fine and I was strangely learning to trust that feeling. I wanted to give her some space. Instead I pulled out my medicine bundle and attempted to meditate. Perhaps if I could get my own guidance with the situation I could help the two of us.

A chirping sound brought me back to the real world. "Come in." I said, while trying to get myself to focus on my surroundings.

Kathryn came through the door, looking only slightly better than when we had parted earlier. Still tired, and her hair was still a mess. There was something else that was off, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. "The Doctor has talked to some of the scientists on Alanla. He wants to talk to the two of us." Her voice was soft, not hesitant, but definitely softer than I was used to.

"Alright." I said getting myself on the floor. It had occurred to me that it was the first time that I heard the name of the planet that had caused so much trouble. Also if the Doctor already had time to contact the people on the planet and go over the findings how much time had passed since I sat down with my medicine bundle? I looked over at the chronometer that was on the table next to the couch, and was surprised to find that just over two hours had passed.

No other words were said as the two of us made our way down to Sick bay. There was not an uncomfortable silence, quite the opposite in fact, I just think that the two of us felt as though there was no need to say anything further until we knew exactly what was going to happen.

******

**Kathryn**

My body was tired. My mind was tired, and yet I had never felt as though I had more energy. It was a quiet energy, and wasn't going to allow me to win any fights any time soon, but it was comforting. The walk to sick bay was also comforting, even though I already guessed what the Doctor would say.

"I'm sorry but at this time there is just nothing that I can do." He sighed after he explained to both Chakotay and I what he had found out.

"It's okay Doctor. I'm sure the two of us can manage, right Commander." I said giving him a smile. He didn't quite look convinced, but he gave me one back. We both thanked him one more time, before going to my quarters to figure out where to go from here.

The first thing I did when I entered was replicate myself a cup of coffee. Thinking always went better when coffee was involved. Oddly enough, the two of us sat in silence after that. Neither one of us seemed to want to say the first words.

"I could probably get used to this you know." I said after about ten minutes of silence. "I mean there will be…complications I'm sure, but I think I could get used to this." Chakotay gave me an unsure look.

"Complications would be putting it mildly." He muttered.

"We can work it out."

He shook his head. "How can you be so calm about everything? How is it you are suddenly so accepting of something so permanent after so many years of saying it wasn't a feasible option?" He looked angry. I couldn't blame him. I also didn't really have a way of answering him.

"I believe that part of that, has something to do with our new situation." I shrugged. "I can't explain it Chakotay. I wish I could but I can't. I'm not suggesting we go rushing into anything, but perhaps it is more an opportunity than anything else." It was hard even for me to believe that these words were coming out of my mouth. At the same time however, I couldn't really come up with another way to explain anything that I was feeling. I didn't want him to go, I didn't want him to be hurt or angry and there was a certain amount of comfort in knowing that if he was in danger I would know almost before he did. There was some fear, and some anger just as he had said but I knew eventually it would pass.

"This is going to take some work." He said after another long break of silence. "I am honestly a mess right now. I am unfocused and unsure of what is up from down." He looked frightened. Yet at the same time determined.

"We should meet with Tuvok. He'll know ways to help. After all he is Vulcan, and this is kind of old hat for him." I smiled. "There will be other concerns that we will need to address eventually." I put my hand on his and tried not to think about all the violence that occurred on the planet. That was a light day for the Delta Quadrant.

Chakotay grasped my hand in his. "Are you sure I can't just put you in a nice bubble wrapped room to keep you safe?"

I chuckled. "I could say the same about you." My mind involuntarily went to the dream I had the night before and I shuddered a bit. That would be something we could discuss another day, and something I would no doubt be discussing with Tuvok.

"Well, it's a start." He whispered. "You really think we can make this work?"

I nodded. "I do." I leaned in and kissed him softly. "We can do anything."


End file.
